Funny dating one liners

Posted by / 02-Aug-2017 15:13

It’s hard to gauge who is being authentic and who are trying to mold themselves in to the perfect candidate for you.So here is my experience and what I have noticed in the POF (Plenty of Fish) world.So I took the plunge as Cam and I set up my very own account on POF to try a social experiment on online dating.Being new to the online dating community I didn’t really know what to expect. Going to Mc Donald's for a salad is like going to a prostitute for a hug. Saw some footage of polar bears drinking water today. Scientists say the universe is made up of protons, neutrons and electrons. If I die in my sleep, at least I can actually say that I died doing what I loved. If your boyfriend remembers your eye color after the first date, then you probably have small boobs. No matter how smart you are you can never convince someone stupid that they are stupid. If you bring a gun to the pharmacy, you can get drugs without a doctor's prescription. Girls Fall in love with what they hear, and guys fall in love with what they see. I named my dog "5 miles", so I can tell people I walk 5 miles every day. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2?"Don't kid yourself" would be a great slogan for a condom company. Dear rappers, please stop putting sirens in your songs. I've got 3 followers so far, but I think 2 are cops. Husbands and boyfriends are the best people to share secrets with… Plastic surgery is the work-out routine for the rich. Life without women would be a pain in the ass, literally. Someone gave me the wrong directions to a massage parlor, and it rubbed me the wrong way. He wasn't amused, but he did say "You cracked me Up." Life is not a fairy tale. My vacuum broke in the middle of cleaning and I can't tell if the situation sucks or not. "The problem with quotes from the Internet, is that you can never truly verify their authenticity." -Abraham Lincoln If it's the thought that counts, think money. Relationships are like farting, if you push too hard, things could get messy real fast. Just like everyone else." -Margaret Mead "People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do." -Isaac Asimov "We are all here on earth to help others; what on earth the others are here for I don't know." -W. Auden "When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second.

You see, I have to catch the train.”The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. "Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake an entire relationship! They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room." -Robin Williams "A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it." -Jerry Seinfeld "If two wrongs don't make a right, try three." -Laurence J. I didn't want to interrupt her." -Rodney Dangerfield "I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens." -Woody Allen "Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot." -Groucho Marx "Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance? " -Jean Kerr "I’ve been getting into astronomy, so I installed a skylight.

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The guys pursue the women a lot more aggressively than the women pursue the men.

One thought on “funny dating one liners”

  1. The system was designed so that devs could assist with technical issues and complaints, NOT for career scammers to systematically target and coerce unfavorable reviewers.***The "features" include all the weaponized toxicity of your run-of-the-mill scam dressed up as a dating app.